Day 248

It can be very quiet out here in the country – just the odd clip clop of hooves going past, or a dog barking – so at times I like to have a bit of white noise in the background.  Today was one of those days and I popped the TV on and got to work at the dining room table.  At some point during the morning – and I think only Holly & Phil have the power to do this – I was drawn into a phone-in segment.

I had an absolute meltdown!  People were ringing in to talk about how alone they were feeling, isolated since the beginning of the year due to shielding.  Some had only experienced minimal contact i.e. a quick wave or conversation when a neighbour dropped off their shopping.  The presenters were teary-eyed and you could actually hear the joy rise in the callers’ voices because they had someone to talk to.  I felt awful for them.

I am an emotional eater (in case you hadn’t realised) and immediately headed to the box of After Eight Mints.  As I took one, I said aloud to myself “just the one” and then realised perhaps I am living a more solitary life than I thought…

The only person I have seen in full 4-D over the past few weeks is Darren.  Well, that isn’t entirely true, as I had to have an eye-test and I’ve been to the local Co-op.  But actual real life conversations about the news or just general crap…?  It is easy to take these things for granted.

Speaking of general crap, as I sipped a glass of cider the other evening, I lifted my pint and said to Darren “this would make a great prop for a film, it is perfect urine colour”.

*****

So yeah, I had an eye test and was told that now I am over 40 years of age, basically my eyesight will just deteriorate and there is nowt I can do (it was more technical than that: there was talk of a  hardening lens).  On the plus side, I only have a teeny weeny prescription, so I am not going full Mr Magoo just yet.

And today was the day I had to pick up my new specs (technically only the lenses are new, the frames are so 2016) and perhaps a little lunch.  I did a quick reflection-check during my pre-travel wee and sighed.  A tired, pale and generally blah countenance looked back at me, so I decided to make a little effort with a dab concealer and coat or two of mascara.  Thankfully I only have to jazz up the top half of my chops these days, so I made my eyes up like a rockstar and beneath the mask I was a complete couch potato.

We don’t mention the plucking of the mother of all white eyebrow hairs.

It obviously started raining when it was time for me to stroll from Specsavers to the supermarket.  At the entrance I was stopped by a rather drunk man, telling me I had very pretty eyes.  At first I thought he was admiring this morning’s handy work and fabulous brows.  Then I realised he was actually hitting on me, so I thanked him and legged it.  Let’s just say I don’t think Darren has anything to worry about….

Speaking of Darren, I had better skedaddle.  I’ve just devoured a box of White Chocolate Fingers and need to take the recycling out to hide the evidence from him.

Toodlepip!